Months and months ago, about February, my friend Judy H. asked me what I was doing in June. How the heck do I know what I would be doing. I barely know what I am going to do after I get out of bed. Judy says she wants us to go into New York city to see a play. Its a bus tour. We don't have to do anything except sit on the bus. All details are arranged. A gourmet lunch is included. Who could turn that down. I said yes.
A few days later, Judy calls back. Would I want cancellation insurance? I'm cheap. I should spend more money than I have to? I told her no. Judy bought insurance. I did not. I thought I was ahead.
It is a few days before our bus trip. Judy calls me. She is in San Francisco. Her mother lives there. Mom has fallen and fractured her hip. Judy can't leave her mom. Judy can't go to see Jersey Boys. Judy gets her money back.
This leaves me with a problem. I can either miss the performance and lose the money I paid for the ticket, or I can go on the bus by myself and feel lonely. None of the two choices sound good.
A friend calls me that day. It is Spence. During our conversation, I tell him about Jersey Boys. Spence says He will go. He loves going into NYC. I call Judy. She has already phoned the travel agency and they confirmed she has cancelled. Judy gives me their phone number. I give the number to Spence.
Spence calls. The travel agency tells Spence that that performance has been sold out for months. There are no more tickets. "No No" says Spence."You have a cancellation. I am buying Judy's ticket." The travel agency agrees. Computers can be wonderful. The very next day, Spence and I are at the bus stop. The tour guide and the bus driver have Spence's name on the roster of names. Gee, that was quick.
We get on the bus and have a nice conversation while being driven into New York. We get the instructions about our lunch and where to meet. It is arranged beautifully.
As the bus pulls into our first stop....lunch....I casually ask one of the other riders, what the performance is about. He answers that it is about Frankie Valli.
Spence looks ashen. He tells me He HATES Frankie Valli. This is his story:
When He was in the navy, His ship was out to sea for several months. They ran out of fresh produce, especially fresh milk. They were drinking the reconstituted powdered kind. A supply ship comes alongside and sells Spence's ship a lot of milk. Every one was delighted. They hate the powdered kind.
Every sailor is guzzling fresh milk. They love it. A few hours later, every one was deathly sick...except the few sailors that don't drink milk. Every one had food poisoning. ...not a little case of food poisoning, but a really serious case of it. Several men had to be hospitalized. Spence spent a week in bed being sick as a dog...and that is really really sick.
On board the ship, is a communications network. One of the speakers happens to be above Spence's bunk. It is used for ship communications and also for entertainment...radio broadcasts, playing tapes and records....stuff like that.
Apparently the sailor working communications, liked Frankie Valli music. He played Frankie Valli over the speakers...the one next to Spence's ears. ....over and over and over.... Talk about conditioning! There is nothing like being really really sick and being tortured with falsetto male singing at the same time.
As I said, Spence hates to hear Frankie Valli sing. Now I know why.
Spence just spent several hundred dollars to be tortured again, by Frankie Valli. I now have ammunition to torture my friend Spence. ..with Frankie Valli singing "Sherry Baby"
The lunch was terriffic. We ate in a converted garage. We were serenaded with live jazz. The musicians were very good. The food was good...main course was salmon encrused with herbs served on a bed of pureed sweet potaotoes. Excellent food.
Then came the bad part. Spence has to sit through the musical. Actually, it was wonderful. New York is top notch in theatre. The orchestra was excellent. The stage settings were excellent. They used large screens with computer projections that were excellent. The actors were excellent. They are full of energy and talent. They sing their hearts out. Even Spence enjoyed the show. The best part is when I need leverage with my friend, I can hum Sherry Baby in falsetto. Spence winces every time.